I woke up after watching Chris Rock’s Netflix special feeling conflicted. 

See, in 2018, Jason Weems, a national stand-up comedian filmed the first live stand-up comedy special in Baltimore, at Centerstage.

He and a small group of black creatives came together to send a love note to Baltimore and a significant message to the world… “We Are The Greatest City in America”. 

Not only was it PHENOMENALLY FUNNY, but it was also filmed in one take. It was a history-making moment only eclipsed (later) by a global pandemic crisis.

So, needless to say, as Jason’s wife (and executive producer), I was feeling a certain kind of way surrounding the recent buzz of Chris Rock’s live streaming of his stand-up special in Baltimore. 

The world had seen the tumultuous year Rock had weathered. During the Oscars, we witnessed the personas and emotional levees Will Smith built crash before our eyes. 

Culturally, for those who are familiar with Smith’s story, I believe black people could empathize with his inner torment, but his reaction to Chris Rock's softball joke did not correlate (point blank). Will Smith was dead wrong! 

As the wife of a professional stand-up comedian, I know that they process life’s pain differently than any other human. Comics are gifted with the ability to turn the worst nightmares and most terrifying trauma into comedic gold.

My husband died, came back to life, and wrote a 1-hour stand-up comedy special about it. 

People expect stand-up comedians to bare their souls…it just has to be funny. 

Chris Rock’s special had moments of humor because he is undeniably one of the best stand-up comedians in the world. He speaks “comedy” fluidly. But, after seeing him perform previously in DC, I could tell that “being funny” was not the intention of his tour…and intention is everything to me.

Last night, I cringed throughout the performance because I could feel Chris’ intent. I could feel the disconnect in the material. It’s obvious he is still processing the pain while working to control his narrative. 

The next morning, I was ready to fight. I felt emotionally raw…embarrassed. I couldn’t understand where all the self-defensive energy was coming from, and it hit me. Chris Rock's special was very personal. Baltimore was just an innocent bystander. He didn’t come to my city to leave people feeling good, he didn’t come to my city because he values us as an audience. Chris Rock came to “bring the pain” and sh!t in Jada Pinkett’s backyard. 

Personally, Baltimore doesn’t need that kind of energy…or distraction. But, if his performance brought him the much-needed peace he needs and deserves, then (to quote the comedian himself) “Touché Ni@#%. Touché.”